He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
