forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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