My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
