sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Randomize
