You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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