I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
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