We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
