i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
