im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
