names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
