And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
