garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
don't judge my taste in strippers
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
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