hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I need a beard to bite.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Randomize
