Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
