I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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