No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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