After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
