I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
She needs sedatives and a leash
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
