Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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