so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
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i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
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Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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