Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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