im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
