My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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