So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Drake has all the answers
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
