So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
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