hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize
