his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
as a side note pls kill me
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
