Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
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He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
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if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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