butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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