Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I can't put those talents on a resume
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Everclear isn't food dammit
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
