took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
