Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize