Texts From Last Night

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  (323): View more from California

  Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.

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  (323): Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering. http://tfl.nu/bd5j
  Replies (31) Good night (707) Bad night (3583) Order T-Shirt
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  (631): View more from New York

  there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"

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  (631): there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship" http://tfl.nu/t0by
  Replies (24) Good night (1147) Bad night (3720) Order T-Shirt
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  (305): View more from Florida

  I don't even know why I got my vag waxed

  (786): View more from Florida

  Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.

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  (305): I don't even know why I got my vag waxed (786): Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed. http://tfl.nu/dtgr
  Replies (25) Good night (713) Bad night (5019)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  we've started having sober sex

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  you really do like him

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  (860): we've started having sober sex (203): you really do like him http://tfl.nu/ocmd
  Replies (19) Good night (8604) Bad night (816)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Every perfect package comes with a warning label.

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  (330): Every perfect package comes with a warning label. http://tfl.nu/x7rd
  Replies (25) Good night (3661) Bad night (1002) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now

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  (516): my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now http://tfl.nu/4n6q
  Replies (13) Good night (1277) Bad night (1976) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.

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  (610): His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here. http://tfl.nu/72ey
  Replies (13) Good night (2059) Bad night (1106) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....

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  (215): Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank.... http://tfl.nu/wvlh
  Replies (27) Good night (1116) Bad night (5096) Order T-Shirt
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  (813): View more from Florida

  Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.

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  (813): Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature. http://tfl.nu/pp7x
  Replies (15) Good night (1713) Bad night (883) Order T-Shirt
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.

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  (270): Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer. http://tfl.nu/zy1n
  Replies (5) Good night (1399) Bad night (1099) Order T-Shirt
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.

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  (810): She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself. http://tfl.nu/zfk0
  Replies (10) Good night (943) Bad night (2557)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.

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  (541): Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids. http://tfl.nu/e2e0
  Replies (12) Good night (2175) Bad night (578) Order T-Shirt
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  (435): View more from Utah

  For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job

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  (435): For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job http://tfl.nu/nykr
  Replies (6) Good night (2078) Bad night (474) Order T-Shirt
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet

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  (931): You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet http://tfl.nu/z0gl
  Replies (0) Good night (623) Bad night (180) Order T-Shirt
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.

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  (780): So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks. http://tfl.nu/pwvq
  Replies (5) Good night (1404) Bad night (167) Order T-Shirt

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