at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Randomize
