I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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