she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
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