Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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