I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize