I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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