is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
