Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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