Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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