Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
