just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
