Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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