I hate your face
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
