i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
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