So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
