He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
