So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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