I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
