I am in a vortex of obligation.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Alive.
So much puke
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
