He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
