your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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